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"My mother was a cult member"
My mother was a member of a cult. Its name doesn’t matter. They all have the same format. I was raised to follow all the cult’s teachings and to obey the commands of the “Elders” without question. By the time I was about 10 years old I was completely brainwashed. I would have gladly sacrificed my life if my Elders had requested it. Nothing anyone could have said to me would have shaken my conviction that I was one of God’s chosen people. In my cult all of us were taught to be aware that everyone outside our faith (even family members) were Satan’s demons in disguise. Those demons’ sole purpose was to pull us away from our faith. When anyone tried to convince us we were wrong in our beliefs we would chuckle silently inside and think, “aha Satan! We have identified you. You cannot fool us!” Thus my mind was closed completely to reality… except for one little crack that admitted the tiniest shaft of light. That light was my mother’s sister, my favourite aunt. She was a non believer so as I was growing up I didn’t see much of her, but when I did, she was always so nice to me! Even when I talked about religion she listened politely and never argued with me. When I’d finished talking she would gradually steer the conversation away from religion and on to anything else that she knew interested me. All through those brainwashed years of my youth I struggled with the thought that my beloved aunt was one of Satan’s demons. As I entered my teens that chink of light that she represented had grown to the point where I would happily talk with her for hours about all the usual things that concern teenagers. If I asked her a question she would often say that her answer was only an opinion and that it was up to me to form my own. That confidence she showed in me was never matched by my religious Elders. They told me personal opinions were, “stumbling blocks” on the road to heaven. The bible, I was told, contained all the opinions I would ever need. When I was 16 my aunt became very sick and I was told that she didn’t have long to live. I remember being at her bedside and holding her hand. It was so frail. It made a great impression on me that even though she knew she was about to die, she didn’t embrace my religion and save her soul! How could that be? How could such a good person willingly reject the chance of an after-life in paradise? This question went round and round in my head, especially on the day she died. At my aunt’s funeral were many of her friends and family. At her request there were no religious words uttered at the service. Instead, the eulogist spoke of her quiet dignity, her acceptance of things she couldn’t change, and her love of freedom and of life itself. I remember that was the moment when that little chink of light that she represented suddenly became so bright, I could see clearly – for the first time in my life! Immediately I began to view my religious Elders and their teachings in a new and objective way. I started asking them questions for which they had no answers. They told me that they would pray for me to overcome this stumbling block that was affecting my faith. If those prayers had any effect it was to make me embrace my aunt’s philosophy all the more. I began to appreciate that I had a freedom of thought that for years had been suppressed by my religion. All those years of being controlled! Simultaneously, I felt exhilarated and angry. Any time after that whenever I came across a cult person I wanted to shake them and say, “Wake up” - but then I remembered - they were in the same mental state that I used to be in. Their minds were not open to reason. I like what you are doing to motivate people into doing something about the evil of religion. But when it comes to dealing with members of a cult I would advise taking the same approach that my aunt did with me. By genuinely caring for me and being oh so subtle in her approach she opened up my mind and enabled me to free myself from the bondage of my religion. Andrew D. Albany NY |
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